by Peter Berryman
Jingo Jingles
Quite a while ago I saw a snippet of a television program on which Bill Moyers was interviewing the Dalai Lama. Or was it Hugh Downs interviewing the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, or Charlie Rose with Swami O'Rooney? Maybe it was Oprah talking with Mr. Natural, or Martha Stewart with Mother Nature, but I'm pretty sure it was the Moyers team.
As you might imagine with any of these duos, there were solid chunks of wisdom extracted from the guest. As I gazed at the Lazy V Motel television screen in Grand Island, Nebraska -- or was it the A-1 Motel in Utica, New York -- the guru was going through a hierarchy of ego extensions, the adherence to any of which he was advising against. The list read something like this: Egotism, familyism, sexism, classism, racism, nationalism, anthropocentrism, and even went on to planetism and solar-systemism, or some such cosmos-isms of the outer reaches.
It also veered off of that fairly linear litany into other kinds of associations like schoolism, teamism, jobism, unionism, and so forth. His point was that as these are all forms of hubris and only get in the way of the true path.
It does seem that as you ride the road toward wisdom (on which there seem to be far too many speed bumps and toll booths), you do pass from egotism through the various isms in a somewhat ordered progression -- the most popular currently being nationalism -- while keeping an eye peeled for the Enlightenment exit (even though we've been told repeatedly that's the name of the highway and not an exit name at all).
Anyway, reflecting upon this poorly remembered TV insight, it occurred to me that each of these chauvinistic plateaus is probably represented in song. The first one I thought of was:
My dog's better than your dog
My dog's better than yours
My dog's better 'cause he eats Ken-L-Ration
My dog's better than yours. --- (©Ken-L-Ration, probably)
[NOTE: Since posting this, I have been contacted by a number of people who informed me that this song was written by Tom Paxton and eventually picked up by Ken-L-Ration! My apologies to Tom for not crediting him earlier.]
Petism! Or maybe possessionism. Of course, there are a lot of jingoistic jingles in the ad world, because that's how they sell their gizmos.
Incidentally, the term "jingoism" came from a song in the first place. Here's from the online Dictionary of Phrase and Fable (via http://www.bartleby.com/reference/):
During the Russo Turkish War in 18771878 England was on the point of interfering, and at the music-halls a song became popular containing the following:
We don't want to fight but by jingo if we do
We've got the ships,we've got the men
And got the money too..."
Crimson Cream
The sports world is another great source for jingoistic ditties. There are plenty of team fight songs, like Indiana's:
Indiana, we're all for you.
We will fight for the Cream and Crimson
For the glory of Old I. U.
Never daunted, we cannot falter
In a battle, we're tried and true
Indiana, Our Indiana
Indiana, we're all for you! --(Melody Karl King, lyrics Russell
Harker.)
State songs are jingoistic, like On, Wisconsin! by Hubbard, Rosa, and Purdy:
On, Wisconsin! On, Wisconsin!
Grand old badger state!
We, thy loyal sons and daughters
Hail thee, good and great
On, Wisconsin! On, Wisconsin!
Champion of the right (!)
"Forward", our motto
God will give thee might!
Might be interesting to compile a comprehensive collection of songs that work their way up from good-for-me songs through school and team songs to nationalistic songs and on into planetism songs. Gurus of the world would probably agree that from the loftiest pinnacle of truth 'n' things, such songs, despite their unifying first impression (rallying "We, thy loyal sons and daughters"), are actually divisive (Wisconsin versus Minnesota versus Iowa, etc.).
Maybe it could be argued that in an affirmative-action sort of way, though, sometimes such songs are helpful when those of one oppressed plane are rallying against the oppression of the next more powerful plane. When workers, who individually have little power, are grouping to resist being pushed around by bosses who have lots of power, maybe there can be a special dispensation. Or, maybe not. Why is wisdom so complicated?
The Internationale (1888; Words by Pottier and music by Degeyter) is an example of this complexity. In unifying on one plane, it complains about jingoism on another:
No more deluded by reaction
On tyrants only we'll make war
The soldiers too will take strike action
They'll break ranks and fight no more
And if those cannibals keep trying
To sacrifice us to their pride
They soon shall hear the bullets flying
We'll shoot the generals on our own side
Flimsy Whimsy
That's fairly rich debate fodder. I don't have nearly as clear a position on this whole conundrum as I'd like, but do remember a situation that brought home the intricacy of it all. Back in my dear old Appleton WI (Appleton, our hats off to thee / To our colors true we will ever be...), at a basketball game of the Appleton Terrors vs the Manitowoc Shipbuilders, the game was going strong and the opposing bleacher bums were howling at one another.
Then an announcement came over the loud speaker: The Green Bay Packers had just won. A cheer from EVERYONE rang out, followed by a weird sudden silence. In that split second after the announcement, no one had had the time to realize they were ALL unified on the Wisconsin plane, and therefore all for the Packers. A room that had been belligerently divided was momentarily unified on a new level of shared jingoism. The group cheer snapped them out of this and quickly back onto the current plane of mutual hatred. But it was a brain-popping example of the flimsy whimsy of chauvinism.
Amazing how watching motel TV can help make us wiser. Bully for us motel TV watchers. Unite against those who don't watch motel TV!
Motel TV watchers know
In their towels brief and thin
They grow wiser every show
Than the fools who don't check in
Or, check in, but then proceed
To leave the TV off and read.